Pain. . . . . . . We All Feel It.

Lately due to the problems I have had from time to time I have been thinking about pain. We all have pain and pain can come in many different forms. Sometimes we can see the pain a person is feeling and sometimes the pain is harder to see. There are times that we understand a person's pain and other times that we don't have a clue.

Being a person who doesn't like to complain and doesn't like to burden other people there are many times I feel pain that nobody knows about. Those pains are both emotional and physical. Yet the few times I try to open up to other people about the pain I feel most of them shut me out. I see those same people comfort others in the times that they need it. There are times I see myself doing the same thing to other people. Which made me start to think. Why do we understand some people's pain, but other people we have a hard time understanding? Some people we rush to comfort and other people we hesitate in a confused state of what to do? 

Then there are the times that someone is in physical pain. There are some people we seem to comfort and show compassion to about their pain. Yet there are other people we kind of blow off as if they are looking for attention or are hypochondriacs. Is it easier to accept that some people have health problems than others? It is my experience that when I am feeling sick or in pain a lot of people give me the feeling as if I am faking or trying to get out of something. Which is hard to deal with since I rarely complain about the pain I feel or the nausea I get on a regular basis. Then when people do listen they wonder why I have a hard time facing it and why I don't want to deal with Dr's who don't understand why I didn't rush in at the first sign of a problem. I was raised not to run to a Dr every time I feel pain or every time I get sick. I was raised to deal with pain and that being sick is a fact of life. So when I do decide to go to a Dr. it isn't over a small issue it is over something that has either become unbearable enough that I can barely do daily things or that has scared me enough that I am afraid of what may be causing the problem. You will never see me at a Dr's office for a runny nose, a sore throat, or the flu. I won't even see a Dr about those things when a boss tells me I need a Dr's note to call in for one day. Personally I don't see a problem with not rushing to a Dr about every little thing. I also don't see a problem with the people who worry all the time about their health. What is sad is I know people who rarely went to the Dr who lived long healthy lives and I had a Grandma who was a Nurse who was always vigilant about looking for cancer who died of cancer. I have known people who went to Dr's in excruciating pain to have a Dr tell them to take an aspirin only for the person to die a few weeks later from a tumor. Granted the Dr couldn't have saved at that point, but if they had done more at least her family would have known what was happening. At least the Dr could have helped her with pain management. Then there are the people I have met who Dr's went above and beyond to save a life. Is it the Dr that was the difference or the patient?

I guess what I am trying to make people think about is the next time someone is in pain maybe you should listen and try to comfort them. I am not saying that if they are continually causing themselves pain or continually looking for attention that you shouldn't say enough is enough. What I am saying is if someone who normally doesn't complain or normally doesn't ask for help give them that moment. They came to you for a reason. It really is a blessing when someone chooses you to be the person they turn to. Especially if the person who is turning to you is the type of person who doesn't confide in others. We all have pain. We all deal with pain. It isn't about how we deal with the pain, but how we help other's deal with their pain.