There is so much progress that has been made towards seeing the real person. Yet there is still a lot of progress that needs to be made.
Beauty is beyon looks. It is beyond your weight, your hair, your clothes. It is beyond the marks on your skin or if there is a few hairs growing in the wrong place. Beauty is beyond who you prefer to have sex with or if you enjoy Sci-Fi to much. It is the smile that warms the heart. The kind deads a person does for another without a reason.
As children we are sent mixed signals. We are told looks don't matter and yet we are judge by them our whole lifes. Society tells us we should love the person not their appearance, but when we do people look at us as if something wrong is with us.
I have friends who are absolutely gorgeous. They may not be the size that magazines show as perfect . Some of them have marks on their faces or teeth that aren't perfect. Yet what makes them gorgeous isn't what is seen from the outside. What makes them more beautiful than any model or actress is who they are. They are the people who will go out of their way to help a stranger. These people approached me when no other person would talk to me. They took the chance of being judged to be my friend even though others feared it.
Some of the best guys I have met and dated weren't great looking. They were the guys that some women would have been ashamed to be seen with. Yet they were the ones who were respectful of me.
Trust me I have also dated some great looking guys. Those guys were most often the ones who treate me great in the beginning and later became possesive and controling. They were the ones who treated me bad.
I am not saying that a person can't be the commercial idea of beautiful on the outside and be beautiful on the inside. I have met my share of those people as well. What I am saying is when will we look past the outer appearance and see what is deeper?
That isn't to say that you will be attracte to a person who is heavier or has messed up teeth. What I am saying is the meanness and judging of others needs to stop. I won't say I have the answer other than working on fixing ourselves and living as the example. We can't fix other people, but we can chose not to be part of the problem. There will always be a percentage of people who won't change. What I am wanting is the majority to grow into deeper more compassionate people. When we do that we won't judge ourselves as hard. You can say people need others to be mean to them to pressure them to be better, but that isn't true. There is a healthy way to help a person be healthier and improve themselves. What I have seen most people do only makes people hate themselves. When you push and degrade people you don't encourage them to better themselves. You encourage them to hate themselves.
In my experience if you want to help people better themselves then carefully approach the subject. Don't pressure or push. Instead talk to them and listen to them. Be encouraging and not discouraging. Care about the person instead of making them want to hurt themselves in order to shut your voice out. How would you handle your child? If your child needed to lose weight would you call them names and harrass them to try to get them to lose weight? Or would you instead discuss your concerns in a compassionate manner? Think about others as being fragile, because we all are. Just some of us have learned to hide when you hurt or break us. If you cut us do we not bleed? The same goes for when you cut us with verbal razors. The difference is that blood is easier to hide. I should know. I have hidden my wounds more times than anyone knows, including me.
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