Holiday Blahs

This year it seems the holiday blahs have struck most people. I am feeling them this year, but I usually have a bit of a problem every year. What is different this year is even the people who usually are cheery seem to be having a hard time even. Maybe it is the economy or maybe it is just something else. The point is a lot of people seem to be having a hard time. So here is why I have a hard time around the holidays and what I try to do to fix them.

My adult holidays have been primarily with friends or only a sibling or two. As a matter of fact I don't believe I have spent a holiday with my parents since 1996. From '97 to 98 I spent my holidays with my eldest sister and her family. I spent one early Thanksgiving with two of my sisters. I went to visit them a week before Thanksgiving and they did an early Thanksgiving dinner for  me. Then about 4 or 5 years ago my brother started being in town here with me for the holidays. What is even worse is my immediate family has only all been together once since I was in 4th Grade. What happened was my brother and I went to visit once they all moved closer together. Even that time we had to fight, argue, and talk two of my sisters to showing up. It turns out it was due to my parents they showed up. So seeing everyone together with their families around the holidays gets hard for me. It reminds me of how two of my sisters want nothing to do with the family. Which hurts me really bad since all I ever wanted since I can remember is one of those families that despite issues hangs together. What I got was family that avoids each other. My father speaks to no one on his side of the family. This is true even though he found a half sister he never knew about. As for my mother's side of the family there seems to be some issues. What those issues are.. Honestly I have no clue what they are. Ideas I have, but no real confirmation. My mom speaks to her Aunt, her brothers, and her father. As for the her sisters and everyone else. She doesn't speak to them and some how it is blamed on everyone else. One of my theories is family misunderstandings. The other one I think is possible is that my Dad's issues caused some tension with the family. Whatever the reason the result is I lose out on the beauty of a family. Unfotrtunately, these are things I can't control. Even if I get my family together it would  be more like them eating, running, and a lot of quiet uncomfortable  tension.

What do I do to help me get past the family blues around the holiday? I try to go all out. I put up a tree right after Thanksgiving and it stays up for until 3 Kings day. I plan and make a feast. It doesn't matter to me if there will only be me, me plus one, or a group of friends joining me. Along with this I try to watch holiday videos that remind me of what the spirit of the holiday is. Holiday music is also another thing that helps me. Just try to mix in some of the fun songs along with the classics. It helps if there are some crazy songs about Christmas too. That way you get to laugh at the typical issues or ideas of Christmas along with your old favorites. Holiday shopping for special people on your mind also helps. Remember there are worst ways you could be spending the holidays. You could be homeless with no family andn no food. If you don't have the money to buy presents then look around your house to try to create some really special gifts for the special people in your life. Be grateful for what you do have and can do. Go to holiday events, create new traditions, try new recipes along with the old, and eat whatever holiday treats you normally don't eat during the rest of the year. Also try to come up with new holiday decorating ideas. For years I have been collecting pieces for the perfect holiday table setting. Finally last year I had it all perfect. Then again  I had my niece here to help with the holidays. Even though she was unappreciative, moody, and a pain having another family member here made the holiday special. I know she probably thought we went overboard and all. What she doesn't realize is she had a mother who always made it special. My special holidays were ruined when I was about 6 years old. Actually from what I hear I missed most of the great family holidays. What I hear is that my parents and grandparents went all out before I was born. Then again my family never had it easy from what I can tell. 

Just remember the holidays are about memories and love. Here are a few other ideas that I haven't done, but they might help. If you are use to having family around try doing skype or video cam to talk to each other around the holidays. I know it isn't the same as being there, but maybe seeing everyone and talking to them might help make it a little easier.Volunteer some where. Maybe if you go out to make the holidays cheerier for someone who is less fortunate it will help make you feel better. Some ideas of places to volunteer Soup kitchens, homeless shelters, childrens hospitals. You could dress up as Santa and take presents to kids who are less fortunate. Maybe if you know a family near by who doesn't have money to do a lot for Christmas play secret santa for them. There is also inviting other people who aren't near their family over. This one I have done a lot. The problem is the older I get the less people I meet that doesn't have family around. Oh this  is a good idea volunteer to go to a living facility for older people take a bag of presents and hand them out. People in such places love having visitors and there are a lot of them who don't have family that come to see them any more. Really sad to see people drop their loved ones of then only visit a few times.

I hope this gave you ideas of how to push through the holiday blahs. Don't let them get you down. If you know someone who can't make it to the family event try to do something extra nice for them to cheer them up.No one should feel sad  or lonely around the holidays if it can be helped. Love ya all and I hope you have the best Christmas and New Year ever.